faster pussycat... type! type!

this is, by far, the best email i've ever received. i'm pretty sure that it's going to change my life. i'm sure it can help you too. i don't know why i received it. it came to my junk mail address. the email address i use when i sign up for things. no personal mail ever comes to this address. Here is the emai:
Dear Jodi,

My name is Burton, and I am contacting all of the California Astrology
Association's clients with an important message. A recent development has
come to our attention that we wish all of our clients to know about.

Please, Jodi, read this note from one of our friends:

__________

A few weeks ago, I was in Las Vegas, [[which automatically alerts me to the fact that whatever he is about to say is true. because he heard it in VEGAS. only good things come from vegas. good and shiny things.]] visiting a friend and his new girlfriend. She's a massage therapist, with a strong background in the metaphysical healing arts. She noticed that I was wearing a ring on my middle finger (the finger next to my pointer finger). She pointed out that it's bad to wear a ring on that finger--apparently it disrupts the energy flows in the body. [[ok, i have been wearing my dead father's wedding ring from his first marriage, to my mother, on the middle finger of my left hand for about 20 years. so i'm starting to get worried now.]] I thanked her, and immediately moved the ring to my pointer finger.[[commonly referred to as the Index Finger, by grown-ups.]]

Within just a couple of weeks, quite a few things have happened: I'm
buying a new home that I love (I have been looking for the right place for
almost a year), I got a tremendous bonus from my employer and a hefty
raise, and my business is growing. And today my loan broker called to tell
me that she got me a loan at 1/2% less than I had anticipated.

Everything seems to be falling into place!
___________

Jodi, my friend is absolutely correct. Wearing a ring on the middle
finger--of either hand--does indeed disrupt the proper energy flow and can
impact various elements of your life. In fact, it may lead to fatigue, a
sense of doubt, depression, or a general malaise. Simply removing a ring
from your middle finger may make a huge difference in your life, just as it
did for our friend who wrote to me.

I encourage all of my clients to take any rings off their middle fingers
immediately!

Blessings,
Burton

Holy cow!! this explains everything!! it's not my fault. i can change everything by moving my rings to my index finger. which i did immediately! now, my dear internet friends, i am compelled to instruct you to do the same. but jodi, you might say, this seems like utter and complete crap! perhaps. but is it worth the risk of doubt, depression and bad luck? i think not. nonetheless, i realize such startling metaphysical breakthroughs, such as this, can be alarming, and it's a big step to take. so i, jodi, will share my findings with you, my dear internet friends, now that i have moved my rings from my middle finger to my index finger. i expect great things are in store for me. luck, faith, riches. maybe even weight loss! who knows? i'll keep you apprised of every new development.