I don't think you're an idiot at all. I mean, there are elements of the ridiculous about you. Your mother's pretty interesting.
I don't watch the Simpsons. I've probably mentioned that before. I am in the minority. I've seen it. At times it was funny. But I've never found it to even remotely live up to the hype. It's not that I don't like satirical animation. I love South Park. But with the Simpsons... I just don't get it. People refuse to believe me. Dr. Stevil just bought the latest release on DVD. He and Lloyd are reviewing the episode titles and reminiscing.
"Jodi... don't you want to skip training class and watch the Simpsons instead?"
"What? No! I do not."
"Oh... you do too... you know you do."
"Ummmm.... let me think. Maybe you're right. Hang on... NOPE!! I don't."
You know what else? I did not like Seinfeld. There. I said it. I didn't watch it, I found it extremely annoying, and if I saw Kramer on the street, I would run up and punch him. Luckily for both of us, he's a character and not a real person.
Last night was great. I forgot to pay my power again. I swear to god I did. I thought I paid it on the phone. But I guess that was the phone bill? I don't know. I'm such a phenomenal idiot. So I get home, and the power is off and it's too late to do anything about it. It was about 8pm, and I would have to wait until today to get it back on. Great. Luckily, we are coming up upon the longest day of the year. Who needs power? You can read by window light until after 9pm! Try it! It's fun. It was also to my benefit that I woke up so early yesterday morning. Because when the light faded, I was tired enough to crawl into bed with my iPod and fall asleep. However, I woke up at 1:45 this morning and never went back to sleep. It was PAINFUL, I tell you. I couldn't read or use the computer to play shanghai or watch tivo, or any of the movies I have from Netflix. I tried for hours to go back to sleep. I was ready to go to work at 3:30, but I waited and came in at 6:30. They like you to at least work a shift that spans 9am to 3pm.
Sleep is for sissies. So is electricity. I tell you these wonderful stories about my loss of power, financial woes, and the ever popular REPOSSESSING OF MY CAR [still traumatizes me to this day] so that you will feel better about yourselves. No matter how much you think you fuck up, you could not possibly be such a mess. I do this for you, my internet friends.
Don't say I never did anything for you.