faster pussycat... type! type!

Conversation overheard while waiting in a waiting room, two sorority girls, one trying to fill out a health record, both talking on cell phones and to each other at the same time.

SG#1: ok, here, where it asks if I have been tested positive for hepatitis, what does that mean?
SG#2: I don't know... [to the phone] no, I wanted to check out the other rooms first, because that one room is hecka-small.
SG#1: does it mean that I've had the shots? Because I positively had the shot. Is that what it means?

at this point, Someone's Mother, who is also waiting in the waiting room, jumps in.

SM: Did you have the shot as a preventive measure? Or did you have it because they told you you had hepatitis.
SG#1: Ewww... no, I had it because... you know when you go to school, they make you get shots...
SM: Then the answer is most likely no.
SG#2: Listen to her, she is like... a mother. [to the phone] yeah, she said I could have the dog.
SG#1: What? What dog? I totally hate animals. It can't stay at the sorority.
SG#2: It's going to stay at my parents.
SG#1: hmmm... AIDS? Oh I'd BETTER NOT have AIDS. "Are you addicted to drugs and alcohol?" ummm depends, what day of the week is it? Ha-ha-ha.. just kidding. That's not funny.
SG#2: I thought it was funny.
SG#1: Ok... are you under treatment for mental illness? Ha! Noooooo...
SM: [quietly] But maybe you should be.
at this point, SG#1goes up to the receptionist and asks
SG#1: Ummm... how honest do I have to be on this?
Receptionist: What do you mean? About what?
SG#1: well, because I am getting the depro-provera shot. But the mom and dad don't know that. And I don't want the mom and dad to know. So do I have to answer this question honestly?
Receptionist: Ummmmm....
Me: [in my head] birth control? thank god!!