faster pussycat... type! type!

Wonderful! And while we're at it, we can light up a doobie and watch porn!

this past weekend, a five day weekend for me, was brought to you by the seamy sexual underbelly of society. nice use of alliteration, huh? first, i came home on thursday night, to find a notice posted above the mail boxes. the notice stated that i should expect contact from a certain officer, from my city's police department. because i have, living in my apartment building, a registered sex offender. in fact, he'd been living there for years, but he'd recently been recoded a level 2 sex offender. which meant that i had the right to know he was there. i don't know if this means he's offended some more people, sexually, or if there has been some kind of national code range review, and sex offenders of his type have recently been upgraded to level 2. anyway, he's into the child molestation, so i am safe. attached to the notice was another notice about "keeping your kids safe." to be held at a local church somewhere. this is important because the notice itself soon moved to the third floor. my floor. i don't know if they were trying to tell us that not only was he in my building, but on my floor as well. we don't normally have notices posted on our floor. but, the important part, i've not received any communication. from officer whoosiwhat, or from my apartment manager or anything. in fact, the notice is now gone. so, i'm wondering if it was a copy of a notice, from some other random building. but used in such a way to encourage people to attend this "keeping your kids safe" thing at the church. then, once they have you in the church, THEY SUCK OUT YOUR SOUL FOR JESUS!!! it's quite possible.

secondly, i recently told fee about my porn email address. this is an email address i set up only because i needed some porn. you see, and this was a long time ago, i needed to get some revenge on jordan, who lives in nyc. when she first moved there, she spent a lot of time chatting on line. and, being jordan, she attracted all the freaks. she encourages them. she had lots of nekkid pictures sent to her. lots and lots. and she would send them to me, without warning. to shock me. so i had to get some to send back to her. it was a game, you see. and you have to give them an email. and sometimes a credit card, even for the "free preview." it bothers me a lot more to give my email address, than my credit card. i didn't want the spam. so now, years later, i have this address that receives only the porn spam. i never check it. it's very handy. i decided to clear it out this weekend and received 201 porn spam emails. of every type. i had no idea that bestiality had made it into the mainstream porn spam categories. neat. jordan and i have played other porn games, [porn games are, fyi, 50x's better for your health than war games, by the way. someone should inform world leaders.] i once sent her a care package. i packed everything up in wadded up pages from a gay porn magazine. only the pretty pictures, if you know what i mean. wink wink, nudge nudge. ironically, she was never able to open the attachments i sent, when i flooded her mailbox with porn. if i remember correctly.

but that is actually only the first part of the weekend. the rest of the weekend was brought to you by sleeping all day and staying up all night. now, i promised myself i would spend some time getting organized today. and so i am going to go do that. at work, of course, i'd need a month of wednesdays to get organized at home.

Posted by jodi at mai 28, 2003 02:32 PM