faster pussycat... type! type!

Let's settle this once and for all, runt! Or ain't you got the gumption?

Technical chats between Evildeb and I often deteriorate into discussions like these.

Jodi: i wish i were psychic.
Evildeb: why
Evildeb: then you'd have to talk to dead people and that would just be more people to talk to
Jodi: cuz i watched that show "medium" and i want to be a psychic consultant. and help people solve the tuff crimes.
Jodi: it would combine my love of mysteries with my love of knowing things that other people don't know.
Jodi: and not only do i want to be psychic, but i want to be THE BEST PSYCHIC IN THE WORLD!!
Evildeb: I watched it also
Evildeb: but she wasn't a very good actress
Jodi: she was weird.
Jodi: but i'll give it another shot.
Evildeb: but I love psychic stuff so I'll probably watch it again
Jodi: i knew that about you.
Jodi: cuz...
Jodi: i'm....
Jodi: THE BEST PSYCHIC IN THE WORLD!!!
Jodi: she's been good before.
Evildeb: yeah, I bet she needs to warm up to tv
Evildeb: it will probably take a while for the show to get good
Evildeb: that happens a lot
Evildeb: I know that because
Evildeb: I'm
Evildeb: a
Evildeb: tv expert
Evildeb: In my class the teacher said we are all experts at something
Evildeb: But legally, to be an expert, the court has to agree that you are
Evildeb: and that requires a curriculum vitae
Evildeb: if you are an expert you can offer your opinion and the court will listen to you
Evildeb: but if you aren't an expert you can only offer facts
Evildeb: facts are stupid
Jodi: ummmm... what am i an expert at?
Evildeb: Prudence?
Jodi: sloth.
Jodi: i am an expert of sloth.
Jodi: i'm very very very very very very very very good at sloth.
Evildeb: do you know a lot about it?
Jodi: sure.
Evildeb: could you advise the court on sloth?
Jodi: it's gooooooooood.
Jodi: sure.
Evildeb: well, there you are then
Jodi: i could start a knowledge base on it.
Evildeb: why don't you if you're such an expert on it
Evildeb: ?
Jodi: because i'm SLOTHFUL!
Jodi: i could do it, but i never would.
Evildeb: well, you won't have much of a curriculum vitae then
Jodi: don't need one.
Evildeb: but maybe in the case of sloth a curriculum vitae is counterproductive to proving your expertise
Jodi: i emote lessons on sloth.
Evildeb: I really need to finish my email. I got one done but I have another one to do.
Jodi: what the hell is a curriculum vitae?
Evildeb: a list of the things you've done or what have you that prove you are an expert.
Evildeb: Like, speeches you've delivered, articles you've written that someone published (proving someone believes in you) certifications you've gotten on the subject, your PHD...it's like a resume
Jodi: hooo-boy. in my case, it's more of a list of things i HAVEN'T done. because i'm an expert. in sloth.
Evildeb: but different
Jodi: i think they are expecting a bit much from an expert in sloth.
Jodi: that's a lot of work. a lot of effort. we hate that.
Evildeb: right, but if you got up the gumption to write your curriculum vitae I think it would undermine your claim of expertise
Jodi: speaking of sloth, i have to go to a meeting now.
Evildeb: ok
Jodi: gumption.
Jodi: i'm FULL of gumption.
Evildeb: that's good because I have to finish an email
Jodi: wheee.
Evildeb: you should take a laxative
Evildeb: to help eliminate all the gumption that's trapped inside of you
Evildeb: because I think there may be a blockage problem with the gumption
Jodi: ha! blockage.
Jodi: gumption blockage.
Jodi: i need more fiber.

Posted by jodi at janvier 6, 2005 12:00 PM