that, right there, is the fortune cookie i got with my chinese food tonight. is that not the suckiest fortune cookie you’ve ever seen? there’s no fortune in that cookie!! it basically says, “oh, i don’t know what do you think? do whatever you want.” it’s a very wishy washy fortune cookie. brought to you by Panda Express. i should write a letter.
Dear Panda Express,
thank you for putting crack in your orange chicken. i have fallen prey to your plot, and am now addicted. however, your fortune cookies suck. please get a new fortune teller, this one is far too torpid and banal. perhaps your new one could take advantage of merriam webster’s word of the day feature such as i have. regardless, i am looking forward to a more fatidical cookie in the future.
love,
jodi
ps: seriously tho… thanks for the dr pepper. you are doing the lord’s work in serving it. bless you.

i have an overactive imagination. today, i had to run up to office max, for more cd’s. massive back-up projects in the works. anyway, on the way back to work, i decided to stop at the Jack in the Box for a fresh dr pepper. and a chicken sandwich, which i would save for later. in front of me in the drive thru, there was a white truck which stopped briefly at the menu, and then slowly turned the corner, without stopping at the second menu, where you order. i pulled up, ordered, and drove around the corner. and there he sat, behind the car they were helping. i got it in my head that his plans for jack in the box were nefarious at best. i was convinced he was going to rob the place. via the drive thru. i then spent the next few minutes memorizing information about the truck, that i could give to the police. however, after that car pulled away, he drove away as well. which could mean only one of two things. he saw the sign on the window that said “cashiers have a minimum amount of cash in register.” or he could tell that i was onto him. he could tell by my piercing green eyes, that i had made notice of his white gmc sierra truck, with the large black stripe on the back cab door, the yellow twine in the cab, some of which was shut in cab door and dangled down almost to the street, the mostly white french bulldog he had with him the truck. the fact her wore a blue baseball cap, sorta dusky blue and he had short brown hair and headphones in his ear; grey – the sporty kind with the nubby things that go in your ear. and he worked for a lawn care place, who’s name i didn’t catch, but the number is 283-LAWN. and his license plate was A66509M.
in reality, he had parked his car to go in and order.
and the above is all true. 8 hours later i remember all those details. didn’t write any of it down, either. it’s up here. in my gigantic brain.