Kids, I’ve got to get out of the house more, or I will never have anything new to blog about. My intentions for this weekend were to clean house and organize some stuff. However, I cleverly disguised this as watching “The 40 Year Old Virgin” and disc one of “Wonder Falls.” And reading crime novels. Not good blogging material.

Soo… does anyone have anything they want to talk about? Any questions they want to ask?

It is over. I repeat, it is over. It is now time to take down your Christmas lights, or at that very least, turn them off. Look, I appreciate their twinkly beauty as much as the next girl. I do. But Christmas lights after New Years Day? That’s just gauche. You don’t have to take them down, lord knows I’ve kept a Christmas tree up until April a time or two myself. Leave them up all year, save yourself some time, I don’t care. Except for you, guy with the Christmas choo-choo train in your front yard, that thing needs to go away now.

If you must decorate your home, take a tip from local merchandisers, get ready for Valentine’s day. V-day lights? Why not? It’s never too early to decorate. It is, however, occasionally too late.

Well kids, turns out a dead squirrel only buys you about a half an hour of high speed internet access. Just enough to tease you. While, there are plenty of squirrels running around the pacific northwest, I think I am going to have to find another way to make it work. It’s just… icky. When the connectivity disappeared, I just had to walk away. I’d had enough. I went and watched something called Television. I don’t know what the fuss is all about, it’s ok, I suppose. I think it has potential.

Here I go, I’m gonna call me some tech support….

Killing a squirrel worked. It was gross, but now my cable modem works! Which means the return of the jodicam, shortly. First I have to wash off the blood.

Oh the debate rages on. This is better than the time I brought up the warm smell of colitas. I’ve tried to stay out of it as much as possible, and let ya’ll work it out for yourselves. The correct answer is, of course, Yoda. We had an equally exciting debate around here as well. And here is how it started, the way all good philosophical debates start, with an online quiz.

Yoda

A venerated sage with vast power and knowledge, you gently guide forces around you while serving as a champion of the light.



“Judge me by my size, do you? And well you should not – for my ally is the Force. And a powerful ally it is. Life greets it, makes it grow. Its energy surrounds us, and binds us. Luminescent beings are we, not this crude matter! You must feel the Force around you, everywhere.”

My result. Paco, he sits next to me said, “Cool! Awesome! I love this. This is cooler than Yoda!” What did he get? Picard. I begged to differ. And there you go. Dr. Stevil said “you are so NOT yoda!” but he’s just jealous because he’s some stupid hobbit.

I’ve had a headache for about six days now, and I’m well and truly sick of it. It must be all my vast power and knowledge.

Extra candy cane striped bonus points if you read that in a Bill Murray ala What About Bob voice.

I’m not well versed in the video stuff. I’m a print girl. I like fonts. But, my little iSight camera makes the cute little videos, so I couldn’t resist.

Typically, when I make holiday pies for the family, I make pecan (aka: Gelatinous Nut Pie) which I don’t like, and pumpkin, which I LOVE. If you get the big can, it makes two pumpkin pies. I usually keep one for myself. Pie, as my Moür Moür taught me, is good for every meal. This year, the Christmas Eve dinner included 18 people. So I brought both pumpkin pies over. But I only got one baby slice. There was no pie for Christmas morning breakfast. Or Christmas afternoon and evening snacks. So I am making myself a little pie right now. How is it I make so many pies, but have no pie plates? Someone out there has a surplus of pie plates.

So, no DSL. What’s more, verizon cancelled my email account. I only need that for an SMTP server, and I could use webmail, but it’s very annoying. So I got my own back up dial up account, so I could quit mooching. And I could have reliable SMTP. I also ordered a cable modem and high speed internet access from the cable company. I’ve had it with verizon. It’s just so annoying and every single thing is a nightmare to deal with, when it comes to the internet. Even their website is confusing. So I am canceling DSL.

Now, until I ordered that cable modem, I didn’t understand how powerless Verizon was making me feel. Because as soon as I hung up the phone, it was SUNNY DAYS AGAIN! I’m so happy, I might just accomplish something with my week off that is already halfway over. Instead of playing the sims. Although, I must say, I’ve created my most successfully slutty sim ever, Thea. A recent college graduate with a degree in psychology, Thea currently has 4 “lovers.” One more and we get bonus points! That girl is a woo-hoo having machine, I’m telling you! Currently, she is working in the paranormal field. But we might switch to athletics. She likes doing the yoga and working on the treadmill.

So, pie in the oven, cable modem on the way, sexy slutty sims burning up the woo-hoo, life’s looking up.

This is what my cousin Kirsten put in my stocking.

I drove the speed limit the entire holiday. Pretty much. For the most part.

If anyone ever says to you, “Jodi, it’s easy to make your own bows! You just wind around like this, and you pinch like this, and then you wrap some wire around there, and then you tie it off and voila!” You should tell them to fuck off and point you in the direction of the ribbon that curls with scissors. And ask them not to call you “Jodi.”

Those of you who hot link to images on my blog, and use my bandwidth for your crappy pages, I’ve had about enough of you. What you are doing is rude, and inconsiderate, and I’m going to start messing with stuff so you will learn your lesson. And it creeps me out how many times you guys use pictures of my kitties face in your stupid comments you leave on other crappy myspace pages.

I’m just saying… it’s not polite!! You don’t even ask!