today is brought to you by the word “delusional”
you know. i used to think it was kind of cute, the way lisa lived in a little fantasy world. a world in which she could just step in and steal people’s boyfriends. but now i worry about her. frankly, j.c. [AKA my boyfriend] is starting to get a little freaked out by her behavior. her grasp on reality is tenuous at best. must be all that thinking in four dimensions.
it all comes back to sexy french vampires, doesn’t it lisa? at least in our world.
in addition to hunting bugs visible only int he 4th dimension, pru also hunts q-tips. and there is nothing funnier than seeing a kitten walk around with a q-tip in her mouth, like a chronic smoker. i need to get a picture of it. maybe, later when i am at work, she hangs out with other kitten punks, q-tips dangling from the sides of their mouths, looking all tough and badass. i don’t know what she does with the q-tips, but if i put on down on the counter, she grabs it and dashes off. she tries to get them out of the jar, but she can’t get her big fat cat head in now. it was easier when she was tiny.
my little brother just told me he is invading the west coast next month. sounds like he’s going to hit from one end to another. just a warning, kids. it’s about time he came back, he’s a native. he needs to return to his homeland.
ok. back to reviewing the user guide. i’m tech reviewing. and currently i am doing some of the most tedious features known to my product. they are cool features, but they are… teadious. je dÈteste des tables des matiËres !
Nice “Buffy” quote Jodi. But you should have quoted something from the episode in which Buffy is in a mental ward because you are living in a dream world.
Jean Claude and I worry about you and visit you but the doctors tell us you live in some strange mental fantasy state. They are going to try a new drug to see if they can reduce the number of psychotic episodes you have. It’s experimental but we’ve signed paperwork for you to be given the newest, and perhaps most volitile drugs in the hopes you will one day be able to talk to us again. And to be able to drink water and not drool all over our shoes.
We don’t know quite where you got the idea that Jean Claude is a vampire. Or French. At first we were rather amused but the doctors said we shouldn’t indulge your delusions. Jean Claude was born in Amsterdam. His mother is orginally from Italy and his father is Canadian. You know all this. You met us at our place in Amsterdam a year ago for a long weekend. Don’t you remember? We also have a place in New England, on the beach in Maine. You love visiting us there.
The nurse says that visiting hours are over so we need to go. Please try to remember that JC and I love you and the kids miss you. We want you to get better soon.
We’ll see you next week.