Yesterday, I spelled out my new theory regarding weddings and marriages to EvilDeb. I came up with a plan, to help thwart the Right Wing conservatives, who are so desperately trying to preserve the sanctity of marriage.
Now, I am 36, female, straight. Statistically speaking, I am way past the median age for my first marriage. Only 14.7% of women, in my age bracket, have never been married. In 1990, the average age of remarriage for divorced women, was 30.6. What does this all mean? What it means is, I should be well into my 2nd marriage by now. In fact, I am rapidly gaining of the average age for my 2nd divorce. I never used my first marriage, my first wedding. It’s gone. Poof. What’s more, I have no intention of getting married. I’d rather live in sin.
And so, I am going to donate MY first marriage, MY first wedding, to a gay couple. They will receive MY legal rights to have that first marriage recognized by the government. It was my right, I didn’t use it, I want someone to be able to benefit from that. Either way, it’s just as sacramental, is it not? Either that blessed holy union is used by a gay couple, or it’s lost and gone forever. I don’t think God likes it when you ignore his Blessed Gifts®. Right? I’m pretty sure that he would appreciate the frugality of my plan, not letting any Blessed Gifts® go to waste. Waste not, want not!
Of course, EvilDeb had a problem with my plan. Instead of seeing the genius, she only saw what she was not getting out of the deal. She thought she should be able to donate her 2nd marriage. I told her no. You are not eligible for the right of Second Marriage, until you dissolve the First. By giving away my First, I automatically move into position of eligibility for Second Marriage. EvilDeb has not moved into that position, as she is still entrenched in First Marriage. That pissed her off. I told her it wasn’t a punishment, she should be proud. I wouldn’t exactly brag about it, tho. But she would not be satisfied until I explained, under my new rules, she would be eligible for a prize upon her 25th anniversary. I don’t know, a big tax break or something. A new toaster? Trip to Las Vegas?
There you have it. I think I just have to call up my congressman and have him write up a lonely old bill, and let him sit on Capital Hill. Or, I shall just decree it so, and it shall be so. And gw bush can kiss my cat owning SWF ass!!
BRILLIANT!!
Daily Archives: March 26, 2004
Have you ever heard the expression, “kissed by a muse?” Well, that’s what I am. I’m a muse.
Sorry, Romy… been running around all day, I don’t feel like I’ve been at my desk all day. And I went to a comic book store at lunch, lost track of time. It was having big sale. I was looking for the first Lucifer book. But they only had #2. But I did buy Black Orchid. Which is a beautiful looking book. I like that Dave Mckean. Plus, he’s a Mac user.
Anyhoo, writing group went fine. And sharing was easier than I thought it would be. Rebecca is a stickler about spelling and grammar, which I am not. So she read our stories with blue pen in hand. But she often just underlined things and wrote “hee!” next to them. Which is nice. All the feedback about the scene, and my entire book, was constructive and very helpful. Often pointing out things I did not consider. We are going to continue with the plan of bringing a bit for everyone to read. It does not have to be from our books. Or from anything specific. Just something. I imagine I will always share something of Lucy’s story. Since that is what I want to work on. Maybe I’ll start from the beginning, tho, this scene is in the middle of the book, with no background, they had to just take some things on faith. But then, maybe not. Whatever the muse wants, the muse gets. I’ll write what it asks for.