I’m bored. Yes, I have work to do, but I can’t do it because I am too bored. The boredom has shut down my brains.
Please send me things to entertain me! You are my brain’s only hope!
I ran into the monkee at the elevators. I was getting off, he was getting on. My little hands curled into tiny fists, without me even thinking about it. TINY FISTS OF DOOM!! Beware the TINY FISTS OF DOOM! Tessa’s fists do not contain such fury, but her soccer playing feet do. She has KICKING FEET OF FURY.
Amelia: What are you doing?
Me: I am chatting … with all my many online boyfriends.
Amelia: Really? How many online boyfriends do you have?
Me: oh, about 7. or maybe 9.
Amelia: Uh-huh. And how many of these online boyfriends know they are your online boyfriends?
Me: oh, all of them. They adore me.
Amelia: Jodi… how many of these online boyfriends are real?
Me: uhh…. real?
Amelia: Yes, as in they exist outside of your imagination. You are chatting with Deb, aren’t you?
Me: Shut up!
Amelia: About case notes, you are chatting with Deb about case notes.
Me: You ruin everything!
Amelia: You know you have issues, don’t you?
Me: duh. I’m talking to a poster!
Amelia: Exhibit A for the prosecution.
Tonight Dr. Stevil has plans to go sock shopping with his friend. They are attending a brunch at the house of a friend who has recently redone his floors. Everyone has to take their shoes off. So they are going shopping for killer socks.
Me: That is so gay!
Dr. S: I know! Isn’t it great?
Me: Only gay men and girls would… no, you know what? Even women would not go shopping for special socks in this situation. They would think about their socks, make sure they are clean, don’t have holes and match what they are wearing. But they wouldn’t go shopping for special socks.
Dr. S: What about when you went to Vegas? For the Las Vegas Pajama Party. You shopped for special pajamas.
Me: That’s different. That’s an entire outfit. These are socks.
