We all know, by now, that I am domestically challenged. I hate cleaning, but I love cleaning products. I am always sure that this next cleaning product or tool will be the one that makes every come together for me. My house will stay relatively clean, I will become more organized, Pru will learn to scoop her own litterbox, squirrels will frolic on my weedless lawn, and cute boys will trip over themselves to bring me cold, fruity umbrella drinks while I recline on a spotless chez lounge with a book and some bon-bons. What exactly are bon-bons by the way?

This is my latest want: The Hoover Floormate Spin Scrub 800. I took one look at it, and I knew that it was the implement of cleaning that would change everything in my life. For $300. The only problem is, I already have a $550 Dyson DC14 Animal Vacuum cleaner. For $550, you would expect some general overall improvement in my life. But the fact of the matter is, if I don’t a: pick up the crap on the floor and b: turn the vacuum on and run it over the carpet, it does very little. Except look nice, and purple, and powerful. So how can a $300 Hoover even hope to help me?

In the end, I settled for this:

Kaboom Bowl Blaster Foaming Toilet Cleaner. Because I like cleaning products that mention EXPLOSIONS. And this one has both a KABOOM and a BLAST.