“Hi, my name is Jodi and I am a spa-aholic. A spa addict… spa junkie… whatever.”

“Hi Jodi!”

“Ok, first, I’d just like to say that I hate support groups”

“We’re not here to judge you, Jodi”

“Look… don’t even THINK about hugging me. Second, while I am willing to take the first step and admit that I am powerless against the goodness that is The Spa, that’s the only step I’m going to take. Even though I just spent a considerable amount of my so-called disposable income on lovely spa treatments, I don’t want to beat my addiction.”

“We think we can help you, Jodi. Every journey starts with the first step.”

“Yeah… well, I’m going to journey on out of here, I’ve got to rest up for my second day of lovely spa treatments. Including the chocolate body treatment! Mmmmm.”

“We look forward to seeing you again, Jodi!”

“Bite me.”