Monthly Archives: December 2006

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Pot… the gateway drug to hardcore spamming.

I don’t know if you noticed the downtime, but I exceeded my bandwidth for the month. By the 17th of December. I never exceed my bandwidth, I’m not that popular. It was very unusual. After some frantic please to support, and some guided investigation, I found that two blogs still existed on an old install of Moveable Type, on uberbrain.com. Both of these hosted blogs have been moved over to my jodiferous.com install, as I have an unlimited author license there. However, spammers had found these vestiges and bombarded them with spam. For instance, one had 47+ thousand comments, only 19 of which were legitimate and those were from two years ago. The rest all came in in the last 30 days. This is the only thing I can find that is unusual, activity wise. So I took care of it, added a couple of gigs for the rest of the month, and we’ll see how it goes. All the spams seemed to originate from in IP in Amsterdam. Which leads me to wonder if maybe pot is more dangerous than we original thought.

Poor Amsterdam, I know you don’t all smoke pot, and I’m sorry that, for many, the first thing that pops into our heads when we think of you is pot. However, I will tell you this, I very very very much want to visit Amsterdam and I have heard nothing but glowing remarks about it, from friends who have visited. And only some of them were even interested in the pot. I’ll try hard to think of “canals” from now on, when I think of you. Or maybe Anne Frank. Possibly the red light distract.

So this is my last week at work. I’d be more excited except I’m a little drained today. I’ll be happy when this week, and the holidays, are over, frankly. I’m feeling disconnected from Christmas, even though I have tried to get into the spirit. I still have shopping to do, most of my shopping has been online. Which is great, but maybe that’s why I’m not feeling the jingle bells. I don’t even have my wrapping paper for this year. I usually pick out my wrapping paper first, I look forward to it. I’m very picky and never used left overs from last year. Picky, not frugal. But this year, I’m thinking I might just do that. Use the left overs. But, the week is not over, I still have to go to the mall, we’ll see what happens when I hit the Container Store’s Gift Wrap Wonderland.

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Uncategorized

BC – it doesn’t just stand for British Columbia

Yesterday I had a dr’s appt. A FEMALE doctor’s appt. The doctor was female as well. Anyhoo, it’s the bestest most fun kind of appt to have, any gal can tell you that. They ask you all sorts of really personal questions. “Are you sexually active?” That was always fun, when I was single. Well, define “active.” Why do they call it “birth control?” It’s not the birth you want to control, it’s the conception. They should call it “conception control.”

Having a “partner” adds a new twist to their questions. I guess they assume we have grown up discussions where we plan the details of our future and construct a timeline. If they saw my life, my home, my car, the inside of my purse, my cube at work… they’d know better than to think I’m that organized. I’ll tell you what I’ve planned. I’m moving to Canada. That’s about it.

Them: Are you planning on having children?

Me: Uhhh… ok…. yes? sorta.

Them: Have you thought about when you might want to become pregnant?

Me: pregnant? ohhh… ummm…

Them: At your age, the window of opportunity is starting to narrow.

Me: oh dear.

Them: It’s something to think about.

Me: Well… I HAVE A BOYFRIEND!

Them: Yes, well, that’s an excellent start.

But, you know, no pressure or anything.

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Canada, William

I believe in… miracles. Where you from? You sexy thing.

So, weeks and weeks ago I asked you if you believed in ghosts and then never told you why I asked. Silly me.

Last month, my mom and her husband, Bob, came up to Victoria to visit and meet Wil. We took them for brunch at my favorite brunch place, John’s place. And we took them on a Historical Ghost Walk of Victoria. Victoria, it seems, is one of the most haunted places in the Pacific Northwest. One reason? The Hudson Bay Company did not follow the cardinal rule of Poltergeist. They may, or may not, have moved the gravestones, but they DID NOT MOVE THE BODIES, when they kicked the native dwellers off their lands and started building. Man, you ALWAYS move the bodies. Always. Also, I don’t think ghosts like the water, so they are pretty much island bound. I might be making that up, tho, I’m not sure.

Wil does not believe in ghosts. I like the idea of ghosts. It appeals to me. But I’ve never had a ghostly experience. And I didn’t that night. Well, maybe I did, I don’t know. One of the symptoms of a ghostly experience is a sudden drop in temperature surrounding you. But it was night and outside and we were already cold. I could have been frosted in ghosts and not known it. Several times we were led through alleys and hallways that were supposed to be ripe with spirits. Nothing. Nada. And I had an open mind. Wil did not. When asked if he was at all sensitive, his response was “I’m the most insensitive guy you’ll ever meet.”

But, it was interesting. A slightly more gruesome way of delivering some history, so it’s fun. During the summer, they have five different routes. Victoria is that haunted. And I would definitely take visitors on one, if they liked. Good times. Spooky fun. Two spectral thumbs up.

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Canada, William, work

Not just another Monday morning excuse.

As you may know, Kraft Macaroni and Cheese is called “Kraft Dinner” up here in Canada. When I was in the store yesterday, I saw they had a flavor we don’t have in the states – sharp cheddar. I LOVE Kraft M&C… Wil, not so much. But he’s indulging me and we are preparing dinner of M&C and caesar salad. How domestic. By “we” I mean “he” of course.

Friday night, my car broke down on I-5, in the middle of nowhere. In the pitch dark. Surrounded by wolves, I’m pretty sure. Probably because I just didn’t get to spend enough money on the plumber earlier that week. Destiny thought I could use some more major expenses right before the holidays. Thank god for cell phones, although AAA could not find someone to come out to tow me, so the State Patrol sent someone out and I paid them out of my pocket. They towed my car to Mount Vernon, where the service station was already closed for the weekend. All the car rental places were closed for the evening. I had to stay the night at a Qaulity Inn. But they had wi-fi, which was, pretty much, the bright spot in my day.

I had to email in to work. I’m going to have to go to Mount Vernon and deal with my car. The spectacularly unhelpful whelp who was in charge of the station that evening seemed to think that there was no way they’d be able to fix my car in 2006. If not, I’ll have to have it towed somewhere else. Everyone says, based on the symptoms, it’s my alternator.

I tried and tried all weekend to find a way to make this tale more amusing. But the sad fact is, it’s just annoying.

Oh well. My mac and cheese is ready! Bon Appetite!

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50 Word Fictions

50 Word Fiction Fridays Vol. 56

A couple of weeks ago, I took one of those “you are so smart, you know our products so well” tests. However, I was not smart enough to sign up for the right version. Color me surprised when I failed! Der. Whata dope. Anyway, I am re-taking it today. Or just taking it. Since this time, I plan on taking the correct version. So the them this week is “ace.”

Watch for Falling Ice

She raised a hand to block out harsh winter sun. Turning her head, she saw the days work, the hunting and gathering, spilled out on the ground, plastic bag still grasped in her hand. Large shoes appeared before her. Shoes planted firmly on the icy sidewalk.

“Way to go, Ace.”

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Uncategorized

Extracting the nutrients of the damned.

Yesterday I hit the drive thru for lunch, and after the Expedient Nourishment Technician gave me the total, I pulled around the Window One with 7 1’s in my hand and just looked at him. I wanted him to repeat the total:

ENT: That’s $6.66.

Me: Ooooooo

ENT: Yes… 3 6’s.

Me: IT’S THE LUNCH OF THE DEVIL!!!

ENT: Oh, yes. Ha. Here is your change, 34 cents.

Me: My lunch is CURSED!!

ENT: OK, Ha. Yes.

Me: My lunch is EVIL!! Oh woe is me! I’m DOOMED!!

ENT: Ok, your lunch is at the 2nd window, please drive thru.

Me: Sandwich of Saaaaaatan!

It’s ok, tho. I stopped off and got a Dr Pepper, which totally counteracts any evil from the lunch. I’m good.

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Canada, pru, William, work

O Canada – my home and not-so-native land?

it’s been hard for me to blog the last few weeks, because I’ve had a secret. What was on my mind I could not blog about. Not until I spoke with certain people first, took certain steps. But, it’s all good now, and so I can tell you.

I gave notice yesterday, at my POE. I’m leaving at the end of the month. End of the year, I suppose, as well. I’m moving to Canada. Ironic that I should do it now, and not in 2004, but since I’m not doing it for political reasons, I guess that doesn’t matter. Obviously, I am going to be moving in with Wil. We are looking to get a place for February 1st. And really, I could not be happier.

Moving to Victoria is a lot more complicated than moving to, say, Portland or Los Angeles. It’s a gigantic pain in the ass, to be honest. I’m doing the research, but from what I can tell, I’m going to have to inventory and price every single item I move over there. Every. Single. Item. Like I can remember how much my monkey socks cost! This is what I am going to spend January doing. Separating things into 1. Taking, 2. Storing and 3. Garage Sale. I’ve never had one, but I have some friends who might have a few things to sell, not worth an entire GS themselves, but combined I bet we’ll have a good stash.

I can’t work there, without a VISA. Luckily, I am in a situation where, if we are very careful and budgeted, I can take time off. I’m going to be… wait for it…. a HOUSEWIFE! Hahahahaha! Oh man, just thinking of it cracks me up. I don’t know… what do you think I should do with my time? Improved blogging output, for one. In fact, I hope to do a lot more writing. Learn to cook, maybe? Kick off my shoes and get pregnant? Who knows.

So… what do you think? Be prepared for much discussion of immigration and the politics of introducing Your Cat to His Cat, and Him, and a New Home, all at once, over the next few weeks.



Wil and his cat, Momo

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