work

Iron, sugar or wood would be appropriate. All three would be fine.

Today was my 6th anniversary at my P.O.E. Six years I’ve worked in the same building, same secure parking garage. This morning I pull up to the security gate, lower my power window and fish my badge out from its cubby hole in the dash, thrust out my hand and THWACK! I hit glass. I furrowed my brow and thought, that can’t be, I pressed the window button, I heard it go down, I hear the outside right now! And looking at the window I thrust my hand out again and hit glass. Once wasn’t enough to make me believe that I had rolled down the rear driver’s side window. So, rectified that, reached out, held my badge up to the security box – nothing. I did it again, and again. I swiped two or three more times, and someone pulled up behind me, my co-worker M-roo. I made the international waving gesture of “I don’t know! It no working!” Wagging my card back and forth. She got out of her car, with her badge, and said, “let me try mine.”

She held hers up against the scanner, and the gate opened. Like magic. Or, actually, just like it always does when you swipe your badge across the scanner. Instead of the intercom speaker, like I had just done. About seven times. “I don’t understand!! Why isn’t it working! What’s wrong!”

guh.

Standard

9 thoughts on “Iron, sugar or wood would be appropriate. All three would be fine.

  1. It was obviously a fault in the design. The speaker should be rigged to identify you badge as well. Also, your windows should be heuristically tuned to know that, if there’s no weight in any of the other seats, then you want YOUR window to be rolled down. At least, the car should give you a pop-up warning, “You are rolling down the rear-window when there are no passengers back there. Do you wish to continue?”
    Sue the automakers and the people that build the speaker/card scanner. Turn your shitty day into theirs.

  2. Josh says:

    I called you last night and you weren’t there.
    I’m compiling stuff I’ve written over the last two years for a writing project. Yep. I might get a job too. I’m almost definately going to Portland in July. I should come visit you while I’m there. Booyah!

  3. Kay says:

    Has anyone else had trouble opening your blog since the rollercoaster quiz was added? I keep getting “a script is causing Macromedia Flash Player to run slowly – if it continues to run your computer may become unresponsive” – do I just need an updated Flash? It’s hell to get the tech guy to unlock such abilities (“So why do you need it?”).

  4. Jodi says:

    you’d think so, wouldn’t you fee. but no, i think my windows were just really confusing.
    you know, kay, i don’t know why it would say that. there is no flash on my site….

  5. I think it is a late April Fools day prank that the windows and speaker have been planning ever since your work probation ended. But because of poor communication skills, they got the dates wrong. Software bug I am sure. Or, it was a hump day mind fart.
    Secure facility, hummmm, there should be video of this. EvilDeb, can you get it?

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