Today was a different kind of day for me. I feel like my emotions have been turned up high the last week. And today was a veritable potpourri of feelings. Most of which I shall keep to myself. But some of them you are going to have to hear about, mes pommes de terre d’Internet. But first, I want to clarify a few things.

1. That picture up in the corner, of the girl on the computer, is not meant to represent me, in the strictest sense, any more than the swinging girl used to. I edited her to give her more of a me-ness. I gave her my fair swedish/norwegian/irish/scottish skin. I lighted her hair to be more like mine. I changed the colors of her clothes, desk and chair, and I changed her glasses, which were black with blue lenses. My glasses are green. I am not a tall, willowy, vector stick. I could go on the South Beach diet, the Atkins diet and the Zone diet all at once, and I ain’t ever going to be willowy. Or tall. My people are a curvier people. We are not meant to walk the catwalk in strange designer couture. We are meant to lounge on chaise lounges, and have cute boys brings us drinks on silver trays. Also, my boobies are bigger. HA! take that vector stick.
2. I’d like to thank Evildeb for letting me mess with her identity and portray her in almost any manner I see fit. She is remarkably accepting that way. For someone so evil.
3. No matter what she says, Fee does actually like me.
4. Thomas has a wonderful way of taking something you think is a hang up, and making it sound rare and wonderful. Thank goodness for chat logs.

Oh, and Matt from DC is totally in love with me. I discovered that chatting with him last night. it’s not surprising, really. We have some shockingly similar traits. We are both funny, we both like macs and hate pc’s, we both prefer bookstores to smokey bars. But it’s not meant to be. He’s east coast Washington, I’m west coast. He’s got a bird, I’ve got a cat. He’s mountain dew and I’m Dr Pepper. He likes to be active and exercise, I like to take naps. He wants children, and I still behave as tho I were a child myself. Not to mention he is young and studying to be a lawyer and I’m old enough to be his babysitter! It’s probably pretty natural to have a crush on your babysitter. Do little boys grow up thinking fondly of their babysitters? Not me, they didn’t.

“Ok, maggots, it’s time to go to bed.”

“But mommy says that we don’t have to go to bed until the clock on the microwave says eight, three, oh. See, it doesn’t say that. That’s a seven and that’s a five…”

“I know I know! But see, the microwave is messed up. Yeah, I messed it up when I was heating up the pizza. Here, I’ll fix it. See? eight, three, oh.”

“But we don’t want to go to bed yet, we want to stay up and watch movies with you!”

“I know, sweetie, and as much as I’d like to watch Jungle Book for the 4th time tonight, I have to study. Believe me, I don’t want to study. I would rather watch movies with you.”

“What is that you are studying?”

“Errrr… history. I have to read this book tonight and find out if this guy here, he’s Rafe Sterling, the King of the … Pi-RA-tes. Yes, King of the Pirates. I need to find out if he ever wins the battle against this woman here, the cold and icy Princess Melody. Currently a resident of Prudytown on the Virgin Islands. But not for long. Now come on… head upstairs before I break out my Mad Babysitter voice!”